Need advice. . .mom may be taking back ex. . .abused me when I was 10?

I want to move out of my mother's apartment; she's taken back her abusive boyfriend and I don't know what to do. He's supposed to move out soon since he'll have his own apartment soon, but. . .





I turn 17 in about a week, and I can't just run away and stay hidden till I'm 18. . .





So please give me some advice here. I don't want to contact DCS again, since my phone and comp would definately be taken away soon as they find out, and I'll just be a minor legally for another year. . .





This man made my life HELL for two years. First time I ever had a suicidal thought.


I was 10 then, and being just a kid, I was naive. . .he took my mother from me, he took my games, my stuffed animals, my dignity, my peace of mind- everything.


He would make me sit on a stool for hours at a time, and still, according to him, I was ';rebellious';...but I know I wasn't, I did everything I was told. . .





My life has been so rough, and I've yearned to turn 18 since I was 11, but that reality isn't here just yet.





It hasn't gotten as bad as it was 6 years ago, but I can't help but worry.





Mom tells me and assures me that he IS moving out, but I know how sneaky and conniving that man is. She's stronger and wiser now, but I can't help but worry. . .





We're waiting on the landlord of the apartment he's renting to put in a fridge - he already has running water, a washer and dryer, etc etc, but I wish that the landlord would hurry up. . .





I'm just so scared. . .I really am, but when I cry or have a breakdown, mom usually gets irritated with me and says ';I'm trying to get him out of here as fast as I can!';





Am I just being impatient? What should I do?





So please, give me advice! Much thanks!Need advice. . .mom may be taking back ex. . .abused me when I was 10?
Thank God u R 17 now. Remember, U R no longer 10.YOU have more control NOW.


I can tell U from experience that if U do not face this situation NOW, this is going to bother U for the rest of your life. U need to explain to MOM how exactly U feel and tell her in DETAIL what happened when U were 10. No holding back. U need to let it out and she needs to hear it from her own DAUGHTERS MOUTH and make sure your eyes r locked on hers. Tell HER%26gt;


If U do not, then U R the one holding back. AND if he definitely this, HE is definitely going to treat other children like this, and worse. Sounds like he is capable of a few different nasty things.


This is something U need to find some1 to talk w/not friends. U need a professional guidance. Go to your guidance counselor @ school, (if U R still in school), they will refer U to counselor, hopefully on a confidential basis. IF U R not in School, U need to call the National Crisis and Counseling Centers in America. There is an office in every state, city.


Please, I am in my late 40's. I can tell U that when I was your age, my mother did some weird things w/her partner, (not my father) and when I was 10, I didn't understand. As the years went on, and I turned 15, I moved out at 16 and never went back. Oh, yes, my mother ended up marrying this man. I can tell u this has destroyed my TRUST IN MEN AND WOMEN.


I mean how can U trust a woman, when your own mother is in deniel and a MAN, when it is a father figure, and hurts U to. PLEASE DO NOT LET THIS HAPPEN. STOP THE CHAIN, U need to talk with the Police, Put this in your hands and make a change. HE will do this again to another family.


Tell the police, say to them, this has been reported b4, I am not saying go arrest this man, but please make a note, some procedure, so that U have everything on file that I am telling U, because someday, U may get a call from a family in crisis or another girl w/a complaint on this man.


Then, make sure that U seek counseling, DO NOT LET THIS MAN CONTROL YOUR MIND INTO THINKING THAT MEN R LIKE THAT, THEY ARE NOT, THERE R NICE MEN OUT THERE.


U will end up not trusting any1. U will not want to make friends as U get older due to trust issues.


I am telling U, seriously, no joking, either get out now, (if she keeps him)if she don't, then everything is different. all will / should be ok.


Do not sweep this under the rug. make sure people know about this man. (authorities).


I hope all works out, if U need to talk contact me @ fantasy12395@yahoo.com


I wish u the best,


PS%26lt; don't turn out like me. alone, no friends, in my 40's, to this day, it bothers me please don't let this manifest in your life anymore, OH and let him know, if he tries ONE thing that U R no longer 10 and a little girl, tell him , (i will take the means, what ever they r and put U down, right where U belong, DO NOT PUSH ME INTO IT), TAKE A STAND. IF HE GETS IN YOUR FACE, SAY, U JUST $UCKED UP!-CALL 911 AND THEY WILL REMOVE HIM AND TELL HIM NEVER TO COME BACK OR CONTACT YOU IN ANY WAY AND ANOTHER THING WHERE U R 17, CHECK WITH THE LOCAL COURT AND SEE IF U CAN PUT A RESTRAINING ORDER ON HIM THAT HE CAN NOT COME INTO SO MANY FEET OF YOU OR HE WILL BE ARRESTED. To do that, start to write a letter to Dear Your Honor, and explain the whole situation....


That my dear, i think will stop everything!


Best to you


Keep your head high and always look forward.


LindaNeed advice. . .mom may be taking back ex. . .abused me when I was 10?
Hi sweetie.


First off do not panic.


Second I would go and have a talk with the local clergy .I also would advise you to go to the police dept.and ask to talk to an adviser on this mater.


Best of luck to you.


Be strong and be smart.


please rate
contact your grandmother or cousins uncles, aunts, or etc. call the police but first you have to get proof that he is abusive get a recorder or a video recorder and tape him secretly and then call the police and then give it to the police.
Talk to your mom more about it and how you felt abused when he was living with you before. It really does not make much sense for her to take him in if he is going to move back out again. The man probably will try to weasel his way into staying longer. Why can't he stay wherever he is until his apartment is ready? Geez, he can move in without a refrigerator. He could either buy one of those very small refrigerators or use an ice chest til his refrigerator is put in. It takes what, one day to order a refrigerator and have it installed? This temporary move in sounds very fishy to me.
You're going to have to contact someone like DCS, the police, or a clergy member. No good parent lets an abusive man move in with their family. I bet that landlord and the apartment without a fridge are fictitious. She's let him move in for good. She cares more about him than you. Unless you're capable of making him afraid of you, you need to get out of there as fast as you can. Do you have a relative or a friend you can stay with?
Does your mom know about all the things he did to you when you were little? If not, then you should tell her ASAP.





Besides, it looks like he's getting out. I understand why you are so worried, but don't be. After all, things look like they are working out!





If he tries anything with you again, tell your mom immediately.





And in case he doesn't end up moving out, you can always search somewhere for a girl's hostel or something or ask an aunt/uncle if you can move in with them for a year until you can get a job and rent your own apartment. Start hunting for job opportunities and apartments now itself. Prepare yourself and make sure you have sufficient qualifications to get a decent job.





Or you could always go to college after finishing 12th grade.